Thursday, November 02, 2006

Bob Ingram...You're still invited to my inaugural ball



Mr. Bob Ingram, apparently tired of being called a 'dirty old man' on National television for his apparent fascination with my cleavage, is at it again this morning and wrote the following in his weekly column.

With all the ugliness in so many of the campaigns, it seems appropriate to turn to a lighter subject.

Loretta Nall of Alex City, a Libertarian write in candidate for governor of Alabama, appeared on the nationally televised show, "Countdown", on MSNBC hosted by Keith Olbermann a few days ago, and forgive me, she surely won the "Booby Prize."

Ms. Nall...how can I say it delicately...is well endowed. In fact in one of my columns some months ago I made reference to the amount of cleavage she was showing in a photo that ran with my column. She picked up on my line and has run with it like you wouldn't believe.

She now has T-shirts which have pictures of the other gubernatorial candidates on them and with the message: "More of these boobs and less of these boobs."

By the way, in the TV interview, Ms. Nall described me as a "dirty old man" and thanked me for getting her the "horny man vote."

I can't deny I am old...but I shower every day.

She also said that if she loses the governor's race...which she surely will...she intends to run for the U.S. House in 2008 from the Third District.


Now, truthfully, if Mr. Ingram hadn't dismissed me long ago and decided to focus on my chest I would never have gotten all of this national and international media attention....which I have just had a ball with. I like a tad of levity with my politics.

As to his assertion that I will not win the election...well we'll see. Win or lose on election night I have won a great deal by entering the Alabama political arena. I have built a huge network of people who will help with the next campaign, made many friends in the media, met many thousands of Alabama citizens who feel the way I do and believe in my ability to change things for the better. That is a major win for me.

Despite Bob Ingram's contrariness (I forgive him...when you are as old as he is I guess you have more than earned the right ro be contrary) I would still invite him to my inaugural ball and when this election season is all over the 'twins' and I will be sending him a fruit basket, thank you card and even some campaign gear with the boobs logo.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

in addition to the fruit basket perhaps he deserves a pic of the "twins"

Loretta Nall said...

Judging from his reaction at even the barest hint of skin I am not sure he could handle a full frontal assault. He is 79 you know.
I'll make sure two watermelons are included in his fruit basket though.

Anonymous said...

Since he's 79, two watermelons may be too much for him. May I suggest a couple of cantaloupes?

Anonymous said...

Since he is 79, perhaps two watermelons is too much for him. May I suggest two cantaloupes?