Ya know...Cell Phones and Toilet's Don't Mix

Yep...so today wasn't the best day I ever had. I didn't sleep at all last night. Late in the day my lawyer passed something on to me from the prosecution and I tell ya....I was laughing so goddamn hard that I just couldn't sleep. "And that's all I'll say about that," as Forrest Gump once intoned.

After a sleepelss night I had to get up at 3 am and pick up my brother in Talladega to take him to Tuscaloosa for PTSD clinic. I hate the VA. Walter Reed is just the tip of the iceburg. Wait until the American public discovers that the VA willingly and purposely over-medicates its patients in hopes of killing them and getting them off the guv'ment dollar. Man, it drives me crazy. My brother has overdosed a number of times in the last three years. At one time the VA had him on 26 different medications. Three for his blood pressure, four for his heart, a couple for his sinus, percocet, loratab, oxycontin, valium, xanax, prozac, trazadone and more that I can't remember. In the last three years he has been on life support twice for extended periods of time and has had open heart surgery.

After the surgery we told his doctor that the huge amounts of medication were causing most of the problems. My brother is an alcoholic with a long history of substance abuse issues. We didn't feel it was proper for the VA to keep giving him these kinds of drugs. We asked that they please stop giving him enough mdicine to kill a horse. They didn't listen to a thing we said. The heart doctor put him on methadone, valium, prozac, and a whole bunch of other shit. Now he is a methadone zombie who can barely walk, is mostly incoherent and just a heartbreaking wreck of a human life.

He is a war vet with serious injuries and a nasty case of PTSD. So, I get him to PTSD clinic today hoping they will put him in the inpatient program. He spends about 10 minutes with a shrink he has never met before and comes out with a scrip for a higher dosage and number of valium than what he already gets. Lord God the man is one breath away from a drug induced coma and....they give him more drugs. These fuckers are government sacntioned drug dealers! Nothing less! If someone without a license gave or sold someone in that condition that amount of different drugs they would be sent to prison.....as well they should be.

Welcome to socialized medicine my friends. The VA is a prime example of what we will get when socialized medicine is ushered into the US. JOY!!! I can't wait!!!

So, after driving three hours each way and having to listen to pharmaceutical induced, incoherent babble from my once intelligent and vibrant brother, we finally make it back to my mom's house and I have to take a bathroom break. As I finish and am pulling up my pants, my very expensive cell phone/pda/central nervous system jumps out of my pocket and into a piss-filled toilet.

Glub....
Glub.....
Glub.....

I almost cried. Not having the large amount of cash it would take to replace it...and since it was my pee and not anyone else's I plunged in after it. After 8 hours of drying out it has finally decided it can handle pissy water in every circuit. YAY!!!

You may think me gross for salvaging a urine/water logged phone....but I don't give a damn. If you want to send me the hundreds of dollars it would cost to replace it then go right ahead....otherwise just send me some Febreeze!