Monday, November 12, 2007

Sex Toys for Troy King

WELCOME OnTap Readers...for all of the sex toys for troy coverage please click this link and read from the bottom up.

For readers surfing in from various places be sure not to miss yesterday's editorial cartoon.

ANOTHER UPDATE: Apparently this post has also caught the attention of someone from the Executive Office of the President...esseop05.eop.gov keeps popping up in my web traffic this morning. Hmmmmmmmm........

UPDATE: I just got off the phone with the Press-Register. They are doing a story on this.

The Birmingham News is reporting that Attorney General Troy King might push for tougher anti-obscenity laws in the next legislative session because of a recent court's ruling that the current laws are too vague with regard to Love Stuff, an adult toy shop.

Now, I only have six words to say to AG King about his anti-dildo crusade..FROM MY COLD DEAD FINGERS TROY!!!

I think that Troy may not have any experience with devices used in sexual pleasure, so, I am starting a crusade to introduce Troy King to the fabulous world of ben-wa balls, rubber weiners and pocket tooties. I want to encourage all of my readers to purchase a sex toy of some sort and send it to Alabama Attorney General Troy King. I also think there is something fundamentally wrong with a grown, college educated, elected official who seems to obsess over what other consenting adults in his home state might be using in the privacy of their bedrooms. I mean...don't we have much more serious problems in Alabama that our Attorney General should address?

Send your SEX TOYS FOR TROY to

Alabama Attorney General
c/o Troy King
11 South Union St., 3rd floor
Montgomery, AL 36130

If you participate and send a toy to Troy please post in the comments. I want to track how many he gets.

UPDATE: This seems to have caught on and is being carried by the following Alabama blogs.

Alabama Moderate
AntDawg
Bitter Old Punk
Daily Dixie
Gordon Unleashed
MetaChat

If this keeps up the entire AG's office could overflow with sex toys. Imagine that scene for a minute..... :)


28 comments:

Christie said...

Hehe I'll go to Love Stuff and purchase one or two for him...hell I could walk there if need be. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the store...I've been there and it is very classy. All sex toys are kept in the back in a separate room...and you have to show ID to even enter the store!

I think I'll pick up a few butt plugs for Troy King while I'm there...maybe that will keep his mouth shut.

Another great post Loretta :)

Loretta Nall said...

I am having trouble deciding between a pocket tootie or a dildo. Your reference to butt plugs for his mouth made me think how nice Troy would look in a ball gag...so maybe that's what I'll send him.

Opie said...

If we all send him gifts due to his public position, doesn't he have to declare them as part of Alabama's ethics laws?

Loretta Nall said...

I don't know Opie...but if he did have to file sex toys of varying sorts on his ethics forms that would be stellar! Beautiful incentive! I was gonna send a ball gag...but if what i send might wind up on an ethics form then maybe I'll send him one of these instead because it will look niftier on the form...dont'cha think?

Bitter Old Punk said...

Does it matter if they are slightly used?

Loretta Nall said...

I dunno if i'd send a used product in this case. Knowing Troy, he woould have it DNA tested charge you for some sort of biological weapons attack.

Almod said...

http://item.express.ebay.com/Hello-Kitty-Palm-Body-Massager-Pocket-Pink-Rocket_W0QQitemZ300165857675QQihZ020QQcmdZExpressItem

It is exactly what you think it is, and King will be getting two!

Loretta Nall said...

LOL's @ ALMod

Loretta Nall said...

After much careful consideration I decided this was the most appropriate thing to send to AG King. He should have it by Friday.

alapoet said...

Perfect choice for the Attorney General, Loretta! I might send him a spare, ha ha...

First Kentucky Post said...

LOL! bee-you-tee-ful!

-Sepp said...

I should move to Alabama. When things are going so well that all the state's Attorney General has to worry about are dildos...it must be that all the real crime has dried up.
Send him to Detroit until dildos are the biggest threat there!

Anonymous said...

I heard about your sex toy drive and was disappointed to see that you were suggesting we send NEW toys. I mean, my thinking is I have this whole bag of CONTRABAND, ILLEGAL THINGS in my home. I could get arrested! I am tempted to pack them up and send them to King. Or how about we all just start dropping them off at our local police stations? Hmm. Yeah, that's it. I'll go turn over these illegal things and turn myself in! This could get fun.....But anyway back to my point, why aren't we turning in our "contraband" instead of buying new stuff? I do like the aspect of also supporting the businesses who sell sex toys, but I think I like the idea of Troy having a room full of USED SEX TOYS better :-)

Loretta Nall said...

I jokingly discussed with a close colleage that very prospect. However, used sex toys presented a health issue. In the end we were afraid Troy might confiscate some DNA from them and trace it back to us in order to charge us with some sort of biological terrorism crime.

Also, no one would willingly give someone like Troy King their DNA...just think of the unutterable evil in which he might be tempted to use it.

IDSA Marketing said...

i think thet we all need to buy them a dildo or anuther sex toy,
if he'll start mastrebuting he woldnt think that..

http://www.lovetoys.co.il

חנות אביזרי מין

VivaVibrators said...

Do we really have to buy and send it to him..? or have to send our own dildo and sex toys.. ?

Loretta Nall said...

vivavibrators....you are welcome to send him your used ones...however, Troy King is an evil minion of Satan and I wouldn't put it past him to try and get DNA evidence from a slightly used adult novelty device and trace it back to you and charge you with bio-terrorism or some crazy shit like that. Just a warning.

Sex Toys said...

I Think Iam going to send him the biggest dildo I can find kinda like this one Destroyer 12inch Bendable

glasdildo said...

Great go on! :)

Dildo Collector said...

I think it's not worth it to send one of my collections but maybe I'll send a butt plug for his ass.

Dildos said...

Its very interesting....

Sex Toys said...

Pretty good presentation.

James Addison said...

Its pretty good post.

Sex Toys Rep - BetterSex.com said...

Loretta, Wow this is a fantastic idea to get Troy to open up his eyes and realize that sex toys are not a bad thing. Why can't he just let everyone else live their own life? We don't want to be as boring as he must be in bed. Wow imagine never having the pleasure to use a sex toy...I feel sorry for him. Open up Troy, learn some things.

Ark said...

Good ant necessary article about nasty things. Its a good way to relax and also do sport activities :)

Vibrators said...

At first I felt this is absurd, Troy and Sex Toys.. But overall, enjoyed reading. 5 mins worth spending!

Dildos said...

It sounds like he needs all the dildos and vibrators that he can get to lighten him up a bit!

Sex Toys,Vibrators said...

lol, really enjoyed this. Especially the comments. thanks