Latex in Mongomery

My friend Bob Kincaid has been keeping up with the Sex Toys for Troy King and the erotic asphyxiation death of Reverend Gary Aldridge and he put together this song called "Latex in Montgomery'. It is done to the tune of "Angel from Montgomery" by John Prine and Iris DeMent. It is HYSTERICAL! I added images so that I could upload it here.



Damn! I can't quit singing it. It's so catchy!

Send me a dildo
I can't buy one in Montgomery
Send me a sex toy
But the deacons can't know

The Funniest Shit Ever!!

I've been following the story of Thorington Road Baptist Church Reverend Gary Aldridge's bizarre and exquisitely embarassing death by auto-erotic asphyxiation while wearing two wetsuits, rubber underwear and a condom covered dildo inserted into his nether region. My buddy BitterOldPunk directed me to ScienceBlogs.com where I found some of the most hilarious comments ever. My favorite so far is this lulu of a poem by some brilliant, poetic genius calling themselves 'Cuttlefish'.

We gather here to eulogize
The Pastor and the Man
Old Gary Aldridge, often wise,
Though not his latest plan.

A member of the Christian nation,
Friend of Jerry Falwell,
His last attempt at masturbation
Didn't go at all well.

For fifteen years, he'd preached the word
A Southern Baptist minister
His death--now, is it just absurd
Or something rather sinister?

How does a person come to wear
Not one wetsuit, but two?
(Although, I know, I should not care
I'm curious--aren't you?)

I tend to think that, years ago,
He spied a rubber glove,
And wondered "Should I--well, you know--
When God and I make love?"

He tried it on, and found a tube,
Half hidden on his shelf,
Of KY--smiled, and murmered "Lube
Thy neighbor as thy self."

And minutes later, hard at work,
He felt a little odd
Was this a sin, or just a quirk?
He talked it out with God.

"Is what I'm doing here a sin?
Or is my pleasure Thine?
Is this as bad as skin on skin?
Lord, please, give me a sign!"

So God produced a pamphlet: "Your
Vacation in Aruba!"
And pointed out--right there, page four--
The wetsuits used for SCUBA

See, God's not really how you think
A deity might be
He's got a wicked bondage kink
(Just ask His son, J. C.)

So Gary died, not steeped in sin
But following God's plan;
So straight to Heaven--come on in!
And bring the wetsuits, man!

A story, sure, but it may yet
Explain what happened then.
The moral is, please don't forget:
Your safeword is "Amen".

I ruptured some internal organ while howling over that one.

This one too...

He was actually found wearing a "Vote GW Bush 2004" T-shirt. The police just dressed him in that other stuff to lower the embarrassment factor for the family. Posted by: MartinC

Seriously though click the link above and read all these gems. It seems I am not the only one wondering how two wetsuits was possible?

Erotic Asphyxiation Anyone?

There is a very odd story coming out of the Montgomery Advertiser about a Baptist preacher at an East Montgomery Church being found dead of asphyxiation while his wife was out of town.

The original story with reader comments is here.

My first thought when I read the original story was erotic asphyxiation (possibly auto...possibly not) and the more I read about this case the more convinced I become that this is how the guy died. That makes it uber-scandalous because he was a BAPTIST preacher.

In the second story out today it makes it look like maybe someone else was involved, but hadn't meant to kill the guy. Perhaps there was a little adulterous sex-play going on while wifey was out of town and Preacher Aldrige popped a vein when he got his rock and his buddy fled in fear?

You know...I generally mistrust preachers more than I do cops. Think about it. They are in a position to learn your family secrets, to gain your trust, to be around your kids unsupervised and never have anyone think ill of them because they are 'men of God." Never have anyone suspect them because they can quote some verses from an obscure book, deliver a eulogy at a funeral and eat Sunday dinner at your table. It's the perfect cover for child molesters and other weirdo's who have such perverse desires and fantasies that if they didn't become a preacher they would be found out and ostracized from the community. Makes me wonder what Roy Moore is hiding in his closet!?

Now, I know of no child molestation connected with this preacher and I do not think ill of people who have strange sexual desires that they act out with other consenting adults....what turns my stomach is the fact that for 15 years this guy more than likely preached against sins of the flesh OFTEN while engaging in that very thing everytime his wife's shadow was out of the door.

I don't know if we will ever get the whole story on this. I have my doubts because if my husband was a Baptist preacher and died while engaging in strange adulterous sex play while I was out of town I would not want anyone to know. And you know the Baptist congregation will be so humiliated that they will do everything in their power to cover up the truth behind this.