This Week in the House

There are three bills coming up in the House Judiciary Committee this Wednesday, April 16 at 8:45 a.m. that I am asking readers of this blog to pay very close attention to. I am also asking that Alabama readers contact the members of the judiciary committee about these bills.

HB601 - A bill that would require citizens to have a permit for a stun gun. This bill is just plain stupid. Only incredibly stupid reasons have been given for it like this one by a cop. "Chief Deputy Matthew Wade of the Calhoun County Sheriff's Department said requiring permits for the devices would also give law enforcement officers a reason to detain suspects who have stun guns.

Great...that's just what we need...a whole new crime so the almighty police can have more arrest powers. Good God!

Even stupider was the reason given by the bills sponsor Rep. Steve Hurst who said the devices can be used as weapons and requiring permits would help prevent them from being misused. "I don't want them to get in the wrong hands. I would hate to see children or teenagers having TASER parties and shooting each other," Hurst said.

How will requiring permits prevent them from being misused? The government requires permits for firearms but that has never prevented them from being misused. The idea that kids might enjoy getting shocked with 50,000 volts of electricity to the extent that they would throw 'TASER parties' is so absurd that somebody should have thrown rotten tomatoes and eggs at Rep. Hurst when he said it.

So, write the judiciary committee and tell them to vote NO on this bill. Last week after it was debated I spoke with one of the members of the judiciary committee who told me that they were about the only one on the committee against this bill. If there aren't a bunch of letters written and phone calls made on this one then it will pass. We don't want that....so get busy and provide some citizen cover for the good legislator who is fighting for us in judiciary.

HB683 - Criminal charges or convictions for certain nonviolent offenses, expungement of records authorized under certain conditions, procedures. Existing law does not authorize the criminal record related to a charge to be sealed or expunged if the person is found not guilty of a crime or if the charges are dismissed or for a conviction record to be sealed or expunged.

This bill would authorize a person charged or convicted of certain misdemeanor criminal offenses, a violation, or a traffic violation to petition the court in which the charges where filed or in which the conviction occurred to have his or her records expunged, including, but not limited to, arrest records, fingerprints, photographs, or index references in documentary or electronic form, relating to the arrest, charge, or both, and conviction in certain instances.

This is a good bill for many reasons. If you have only been charged but not convicted of a crime then you should have a right to have your name, fingerprints, photos and anything else related removed from the state database. Most companies do background checks and even if you have had your charges dismissed your info is still available. Having a old charge that you were never convicted of pop up on a search could prevent you from getting hired, from getting federal student financial aid, from getting public housing of food assistance and could be very problematic if you decide to travel outside the country.

Contact the members of the Judiciary Committee and ask them to vote YES on HB683.

HB12 - Under existing law, the sale of devices for sexual stimulation is prohibited. This bill would delete this provision.

This bill by Rep. John Rogers would repeal the ban on the sale of adult novelty items in the state of Alabama. Currently you can buy them here but you have to sign a piece of paper stating that the purchase is for a 'medical or other bona fide purpose'. No adult should have to sign anything in order to be able to purchase a piece of vibrating silicone. That's just plain silly!

The state has no business regulating the sale of certain items consenting adults might use in the privacy of their bedrooms. No business at all. The legislature and my bedroom in the same thought makes me cringe. YUCK! Considering that Alabama has one of the highest rates of sexually transmitted diseases in the country the sale of sex toys should not only be legal...apparently it should also be strongly encouraged. The 5th Circuit Court of Appeals recently struck down a law that banned the sale of these devices in Texas. That ruling also affected our neighbor Mississippi. That left Alabama as the only state in the US with a law banning the sale of sex toys, making us once again, along with lots of help from Attorney General Troy King, the laughingstock of the nation. Not that some of us didn't do a little laughing of our own.....



Contact the members of the judiciary committee and tell them to vote YES on HB12.

Committee contact info


marcel.black@alhouse.org
Charles.Newton@alhouse.org
Steve.McMillan@alhouse.org
Spencer.Collier@alhouse.org
Paul.DeMarco@alhouse.org
Priscilla.Dunn@alhouse.org
Chris.England@alhouse.org
Laura.Hall@alhouse.org
Tammy.Irons@alhouse.org
Jamie.Ison@alhouse.org
Marc.Keahey@alhouse.org
John.Robinson@alhouse.org
Yusuf.Salaam@alhouse.org
Howard.Sanderford@alhouse.org
Cam.Ward@alhouse.org



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The Useful Idiot

Usually when I get super-retarded comments on the site I just reject them. However, I got one today that is so incredibly asinine that I simply must share it with my readers. This person, and others like them, are what I call useful idiots in the political arena.

hi, my name is Watch Out, thats right watch out, because you people don't see me coming. Did you know that SEX is 100% better without a sex toy. did you know that sex toys are oftened used for sex crimes against children. If someone has a legitimate need for this device, they can buy it at a drugstore. I even think a person should have a doctors prescription for this. do you want your 11 or 12 year old child looking at porn and playing with sex toys at their friends houses. I know this BECAUSE IT happened to me, I blocked it out for 20 years, and I still have emotional issues today. So I think all of you are a bunch of stupid fools!!! signed WATCH OUT, cause i am just gettin started. ***********

There are many problems with this type of illogic.


"Did you know that SEX is 100% better without a sex toy."

First, there really should have been a question mark after 'toy'. Where is the science to back up that statement? This is nothing more than the opinion of an anonymous person. Maybe, in their experience, sex has always been better without a sex toy. So, in their mind, we should outlaw sex toys, because, hey, if Watch Out doesn't need one then, you don't either. That makes about as much sense as me saying I can't have good sex without a sex toy, therefore, we should pass a law that says everyone must use a sex toy during sex.

did you know that sex toys are oftened used for sex crimes against children.

There again the question mark thing. More importantly though, no, I didn't know that sex toys were often used in sex crimes against children. I don't think I have ever heard that anywhere ever before. Show me proof. You could potentially use anything in a sex crime against a child. If someone used a common household item, like a wooden spoon, would you seek to outlaw those too? Adult novelty items have absolutely nothing to do with sex crimes against children. People who commit sex crimes against children would do it no matter what devices were available.

If someone has a legitimate need for this device, they can buy it at a drugstore. I even think a person should have a doctors prescription for this.

Drug stores in Alabama don't carry adult novelty devices. And...who cares what you think about why someone needs one and what they should have to go through to get it? What are you...the Alabama Sex Czar? Who appointed you so?> Did I get a vote on it?

do you want your 11 or 12 year old child looking at porn and playing with sex toys at their friends houses. I know this BECAUSE IT happened to me, I blocked it out for 20 years, and I still have emotional issues today.

Does anyone want their 11 or 12 year-old child playing with a sex toy under any circumstances? Why, of course not! This is where parental responsibility comes into play. Know who your children are going home with. Sounds like your parents failed in that duty if what you say happened is true. Just because when you were 11 or 12 you went to a friends house and saw or played with a sex toy and claim to be emotionally damaged from it does not mean that sex toys should be outlawed. Just because your parents were irresponsible does not mean that everyone else is, or that everyone else should be punished for the failings of your parents. No doubt you have emotional issues and, I'll give you a point or two there for being honest, but your whole philosophical bent is that, because you had some sort of bad experience with a sex toy that sex toys should be outlawed for everyone else. That is what eventually becomes 'legislation by anecdote' and you are what I call a useful idiot.

Politicians use people like you because you will actually get up in front of a crowd and say space case stuff like this. You confuse three or four volatile issues, sex toys, sex crimes against children, children having access to sex toys and 'emotional damage' from a sex toy (that's really hysterical) and what happens is, once people hear the words 'sex crimes against children' the blinders go on and they hear and see nothing else. Not even Jesus himself could cure them of such irrational blindness.

Sex toys are inanimate objects and are incapable of hurting anything of their own accord. They don't have any accord to speak of. They are made of plastic or rubber after all. This is not an issue that has anything to do with children. Or sex crimes. Or sex crimes against children. No rational person believes that it is. Unfortunately, the State House is not filled with rational people and, people tend to become completely irrational when any sex issue is being discussed. I expect Attorney General Troy King and others like Senator Hank Erwin or Rep. Gerald Allen will scoop you up and parade you about as their "poor victim who was assaulted by a dildo" poster child.

Boy Howdy this legislative session is shaping up to be a doosie! I can't wait til Feb. 5.

See you in the halls Watch Out. I must warn you, however, that if you show up at the State House you will be surrounded by fake dicks and, because of your emotional issues with such things, it could get really uncomfortable.

Ban on Sex Toys Targeted

The Mobile Press-Register is reporting that Rep. John Rogers (D-BHAM)has prefiled a bill for the 2008 session to repeal the ban on sex toys.

Rogers tries again to revoke ban
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
By BRIAN LYMAN
Capital Bureau

MONTGOMERY -- A Birmingham legislator has filed a bill that would revoke the state's 10-year ban on the sale of sex toys, a prohibition that has drawn national attention and led to lengthy court battles.

It's the second attempt by state Rep. John Rogers, D-Birmingham, to strike the 1998 prohibition on the sale of such devices.

"A shower head could be considered a sex toy," he said. "It's just bringing the state into the 20th century."

I'll be calling John today and seeing what kind of advocacy he and I can cook up for this bill. I already know it involves a live pig...so stay tuned. And bless John Rogers for being brave and taking the initiative on this one. Back in 2003 he stood on the House floor and waved a big ol' dildo around when asking for a repeal of this bill.

Dan Ireland, executive director of the Alabama Citizens' Action Program, a Baptist group, said it would oppose any effort to overturn the law.

"Laws are made to protect the public," he said. "Sometimes you have to protect the public against themselves."

Ireland said the ban is a "good law" that has bolstered public safety.

"Sexual matters are not to become a nuisance to people and the community," he said. "We have enough problems with sexual-oriented crimes without enticing or promoting it."


Protect the public from itself? How are sex toys dangerous to the public (notwithstanding Baptist preacher Gary Aldridge)? So, selling sex toys promotes sex crimes? When is the last time you heard of someone being sexually assaulted by a dildo? Maybe Dan Ireland in all his Baptist Glory is out to avenge Rev. Gary Aldridge's Death by DILDO. You know...I may not be religious today, but I was raised in church and I do know what the bible says. I do not recall ever coming across a verse that says "Thou shalt have no other dildo's before me." It just ain't there. It's people like Dan Ireland and Troy King who pretend sex is BAD and touching yourself is BAD and everything to do with being a human being is BAD that leads to way the good Rev. Aldridge checked out.

Attorney General Troy King's office has suggested that the vagueness in the bill should be addressed by the Legislature. A message left with spokesman Chris Bence Monday afternoon was not returned.

Where is Troy anyway? All I have heard out of him before I busted his ass in the media was "sex toy ban, sex toy ban, sex toy ban" and now that he has been challenged in the most public and humiliating of ways the chicken is no where to be found. What a pansy. If he didn't want to fight then he shouldn't have thrown the first rock!


Randy Brinson, chairman of the Christian Coalition of Alabama, did not have any comment. "It seems we have better things to deal with than that, but I need to study it more," he said.

Finally! A Christian with some sense. Mr. Brinson you may be the saving grace of your folks yet!

Loretta Nall, the 2006 Libertarian gubernatorial nominee, recently began a "Sex Toys for Troy King" drive in protest of the law, which she called a waste of time and an invasion of privacy.

She called Rogers' bill "absolutely superb" and hoped her drive would help it pass.

"If anything, it will make the Legislature and Troy King aware that we want repeal," she said. "My gut feeling is we won't see a lot of people pushing to make it tougher."

But...we will see some and two of them will be Dan Ireland and Troy King. Today Dan Ireland gets a sex toy. I am torn between getting him a Blow Up Sheep or something a little more ummmm personal. I'm thinking the more personal one cuz nothing says "Take your religion and shove it up your ass" quite like one of those would.

So, readers, should I send a blow up sheep or the more personal toy? Vote in the comments. The winner will be announced at the end of the day.

I can already tell that the 2008 legislative session is going to be a very busy and fun one for your's truly.